Essence of a Woman

When we are in the wombs of our moms, the nature doesn't allow her to choose whether she will have a boy or girl. Thats law of nature for keeping the balance between "nurturer" & "provider". As we come out into this world we are immediately put into a category of boy or girl. This very fact makes the difference giving the girl an essence of being a woman. My blog will dive into further details of it.

Introduction

The moment a girl realises she is going to be a woman, all sorts of things start to collapse on her, the fact that she has to undergo many physical & mental changes throughout her life, she has move into a new house at some point, she has to accept a new family as her own, she has to handle professional ( if allowed ) & personal life with equal panache & so on. All this starts to become much of burden than an essence of feminity.

Often women feel trapped or suffocated for being born as women , its hard to imagine what circumstances families, society & people around them create for them. As we talk of modern age & day I still don't think women get what they deserve. To discover what they exactly go through lets dive deep into some key aspects.

Freedom

• What people think it is :-

• Giving her choice of own clothes

• Allowing her to get education as much as she wants

• Letting her work before & after marriage

• Allowing her for hangouts with friends

• What it really must be:-

• Giving her the choice of when & to whom she wants to marry or whether she wants to marry

• Allowing her to be independent ; financially & physically e.g. moving into own house 

• Accepting her as a human being if she is a single mother 

• Not pasting labels on her as divorcee, rape victim, acid attack victim etc

• Giving her the choice of when / if she wants to have a baby.

• Treating her with no difference from other employees at workplace.

Empowerment

• What people think it is:-

• Education, Profession

• Getting her married

• Allowing her to speak her mind

• Asking her opinion

• Allowing her to take some household decisions

• Supporting her in her bad times

• What it really must be :- 

• Not asking her to sacrifice her career so as to look after house 

• Not asking for anything else aprt from a girl in marriage.

• Not being envious, jealous if she is in supreme command in her profession

• Don't sympathise ! Accept her instead

• Not taking any adavantage of her just because she is a "woman". 

• Domination, ego are too fragile to break her from within , don't use them.

• Its not mandatory for only a woman to do household chores, its the responsibility of each & every person who lives in that house. Its better that everyone does their own part.

• What she wants to do after coming out of a troubled marriage/ relationship is entirely her decision , help her to take right path , give her hope not to find someone again but to find herself first.

The above mentioned things like choice of clothing, education , profession etc are basic rights irrespective of gender they must be available to everyone. The points mentioned in next paragraph hold significance towards giving freedom to women. 
Here we can clearly see why & how often essence of feminity is misunderstood.

If women start walking on the latter mentioned path only then I would consider them as empowered & free women.

Busting The Taboo

The one thing that makes me furious is taboos & superstitions which are non sense & bear no fruit except arresting your own & society's progress. To bust the taboo is an individual task. You stop following & believing in them & it won't pass to future generations.

I don't think there is any point to ask people to change because the more we ask the more they tend to stick on the same thing & label us as "rebel". Don't ask them to change, instead you change for yourself automatically the process will pass on.

Women have been the ideal targets for all kinds of taboos for generations. 

• Don't enter kitchens when in menses

• Walk 3 steps backwards, 4 steps forward 

• Keep a fast in order to get a good husband / extend life of current husband / wish for same husband in next birth 

• Put right foot first 

The list will go on, I personally don't see any point in following all these things if that makes me "agnostic" , "arrogant" or "rebel" in everyone's mind then so be it.
But I request you all to give it a practical thought of whether any of these things will make any significant change to your lives ?
Nobody has control over future , what has to happen will happen so instead of wasting time & energy in all these things channel it in building yourself, your personality, try & be the best version of yourself

Have aspirations, goals, ambitions , high targets , work your heads off to achieve them. Surely its bound to bear a fruit.

I have been blessed to have this mindset & yes my upbringing is responsible for it. But you don't get everything from your family.
A part of it is my own learnings from the experiences I had in my life.
From this blog I would like to tell everyone :-

• Go take risks

• Make mistakes

• Learn from mistakes & move on to never repeat them

• Be optimistic but practical

• Be kind, generous

• Be open minded 

Only then we can bust taboos.

Self Love, Care & Kindness 

The very essence of being a woman lies in the acceptance of the fact that you must love & care for yourself , be kind to yourself first.
To practice this daily follow these tips:-

• Pamper yourself , take care of your health , looks by eating good & staying fit

• Don't sacrifice your happiness to make others happy

• Devote quality time to yourself

• Don't cut down on anything that keeps you happy

• Priority - Always YOU first

• Be Selfish , be greedy , be single minded ; the only key to being successful

• Be proud , be confident.

• Don't discriminate yourself as woman , automatically others won't be able to.

• Don't believe in " Barriers "

• Don't have fear of failure. Law of average will catch up with you.

• Be kind to yourself in tough times, don't wait for an arm around your shoulder.

• Celebrate yourself, don't wait for somebody to buy you gifts.

I know many of you may find this blog totally bizzare & insane. But I am proud enough to tell you that I practice these values thoroughly & they have made me what I am today.

For me this is essence of a woman, what is it for you ? Tell me in Comments

NOTE - This Blog doesn't mean any offense to anyone. This is my personal view on how women should carry themselves for their own betterment.

I hope this blog turns out to be helpful to all those who read it.

I hope you enjoyed reading this blog . Thank you so much.

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